Lions and Tigers and ... Horses!?

Oh my!

He's a veterinarian and, before we meet, he warns me he might 'smell like animals". What an opening line! Who does that? Who goes to meet a gal, a gal you might want to date, and shows up in suspenders, a frayed t-shirt, with the disclaimer that he might "smell"!? 

As it turns out, he is a veterinarian and a horse breeder. He does not have a date vehicle but drives an old truck that is also his on call vehicle. The smell (you might ask?) is of horses. It seems that a shower is not enough to completely eliminate the odor, especially if the vehicle you are traveling in also smells of horse. And (bada boom, bada bing), he is 68 years old - closer to my mother's age than to mine. I'm pretty sure this is going nowhere, but he is amusing and genuine, and cute. Dinner is lite, and the conversation is loud.. can we say hearing loss?  He tells me about his horses, his life, and his reasons for being online at a dating site...as it turns out, his old girlfriend doesn't want to do it any more... damn!

As the evening wears on, the restaurant gets louder and we end it, with him walking me to my car. It was nice, but despite two follow up phone calls (in one, I asked how he was and he told me he was naked!), I am pretty sure this is going nowhere... call me shallow, but I like to date a man who has a car that is date worthy. I'm pretty sure I am worth that! 


Date number 2 this past week was with the younger man - 62 - cute, sexy, and the owner of two date-worthy cars - the widower! I might have to see him again... he cooks, pours wine, and has great lips..

~A. Tan Gledmess

Slowing Down...

"Friday (Saturday?) night, and I ain't got no money..." seems to be the theme this month. Holidays are upon us again and money is tight... I also "can't get no satisfaction" in the man department. Why is that? I am beginning to suspect it might just be me.. wrong place, wrong time, wrong era...

The last man I saw was the Getaway Man.. remember him? Only this time, he wasn't able to get away as easily.. I was at his place! We have an interesting relationship - given that a relationship is defined as a state of affairs existing between those having relations or dealings. Indeed, this is what we have.. a state of affairs, occasional dealings. I would like to think of him as a boy-toy, but the truth is, we have become friends.. with benefits.  And, as long as no one falls in love, all will be fine. 

The Vegan Lawyer is history, the Cowboy revisited briefly - primarily he seemed interested in how I could help him reinstate his profile on a dating site, and a date was had with the Fireman! In fact, a week was had with The Fireman, who disappeared when I suggested that perhaps he should have a plan when asking me out on a Friday night. Being the social director is not yet my job. What is that all about? (W?RUFK!?). 

Dinner last Sunday with the widower was pleasant as well and it looks like breakfast this Sunday is a possibility too. Although he has been on his own only a short time, he did suggest that I park my car in his drive rather than walk over (he lives a short distance away) so that we could "give 'em something to talk about" in the neighborhood! I kind of like his sense of humor... maybe, just maybe... 

And, so the beat goes on. I have been actively dating again since last April and have seen approximately 30 men - and no, I am not going back to count them; that just seems like too much work. I am not really discouraged and I am not really surprised. When spitting in the wind, the best one can hope for is to avoid the back-splash, and so far, I seem to be doing a fair job of that! I am thankful for the opportunities I have had thus far to meet interesting men. I am thankful that the weird ones have not been overly weird; and I am thankful that I am still young enough to enjoy the adventure.

Happy Thanksgiving my friends! Don't let the turkeys get you down...










~A. Tan Gledmess 

The Vegan Lawyer..

And what is wrong with this title? Vegan? Lawyer? Somehow I always envision a lawyer as  a carnivore, a predator, a meat eater!

STM's profile was somewhat on the light side. He'd rather not state his income (and after one date, I am apt to believe it is not much), and he is " as much at home in an art gallery as on a hiking trail." I have to say I am not believing that so much either, given the beanie he wears. Beatniks don't usually camp or hike. And, he's only been a vegan for a short time, so he still wears leather shoes and belt.. can't leap too far too fast when you have already spent a number of years on the "10 yard line".. and you have love that - football metaphors from a man who does NOT watch football.

We meet online, and agree to a Sunday evening coffee date, which does turn into a lite fare evening at a little place downtown.. did I mention he does not drink as well?? So, here we are.. I order meat and wine, he orders tea and salad. No cheese, please. Jeesh! But hey, I am trying to drop my shallow thinking and he is, after all, an attorney. I appear to be moving up the food chain. I need to give this a chance... did I mention he never smiled? Not once. Who doesn't smile? I am funny, you know!
 
But, hey, that's not all.. he is also a Quaker... I do wonder about that as Quakers "do not swear oaths" ..don't lawyers have to swear an oath?

Moving on ... date 2 or real date 1; call it what you wish.. remember, I am trying to be fair here.. 
Dinner @ Subway: $12.00
Movie @ Cheap Seats: $7.00
Kiss goodnight: YUCK! 

I'm going back to my normal, shallow self. It's safer that way.

~A. Tan Gledmess

ps: STM stands for Stair Master.. gotta love a guy with a streak of creativity.. and no, I did not ask!

4 Weeks Later...

And I am still a single woman. I would (honestly) like to be surprised by this, but alas, I am not. On the one hand, I am pretty sure that I am still not ready .. not ready to trust my own judgement, much less the judgement of a guy. Secondly, I am pretty sure that the men I am running into these days are more broken than I feel. And, I am not settling for whoever might like/love me. I need to love him, and love him madly. My mother suggests that "at this age" I might need to understand that men are not perfect and that I will not find the perfect man", but I do insist that at this age, I am entitled to the man who is perfect for me. Why settle for less?

Onward and forward we go... dating adventures.. I met the Navy guy earlier this month. We seemed to hit it off.. three dinner dates later, he is Silent Sam. Suddenly I do get an email and he apologizes for "breaking up" via email.. this "relationship is not working for him". I have to admit I am a bit stumped, and I am also pretty sure (since we had the serial dating conversation) that he was/is dating others and simply found someone he liked better.. or conversely was scared of really making a connection with me. Either way, in my mind, three dinner dates does not a relationship make, even when sex is involved. I mean, come on, we are all grownups who grew up in the Age of Aquarius! And, in my gracious response to his break up email, I said so. Thanks for playing.

What is it with my generation? Are we so afraid of broken hearts and broken bank accounts that being in a relationship is unthinkable? And if this is true, why are dating sites so jam packed with guys saying they want a "serious relationship"?

I'm pretty sure women don't lie....

~A. Tan Gledmess